current location: home
current mood: frustrated
current song: sound of madness - shinedown
So I have to work on getting my priorities straight. I mean, they're straight in my head, in theory. But really, I'm not doing so well. I feel like I'm stuck in a rut. So much to do at once, so many things.
The last thing I need right now is a relationship to focus on besides the one with my children. And yet, what do I do. But it's a hell of alot different, we're taking it as slow as we know how. So what do I do next? I called Amy. I'm waiting on the phone call back. Next, get my resumes done and get them out. So...how do I get my resumes? I can do it for free when I go into the city tomorrow. So I will do that. And hand out some while I'm in the city too. Then I have to see a dr. Yay...ugh. It needs to be done. I need out of this rut.
Maybe I should just focus on that much. Thats three things pretty much being done at once. Is that alot? Right now for me, it is. Ok, so phone call, resumes, dr. Resumes do involve three separate things. Thats Tuesday. Fuck. I need to go get the prescription filled too. Ok, enough! No more! I feel so overwhelmed, and yet normally I'm doing so much more than this and it never bothered me. Maybe because I feel so pressured due to deadlines. I hate deadlines. Everyone is pushing, and I feel so squished. But at the same time I need it.
One other thought. When it comes to it (and it will) should I put visits with the kids ahead of working, or should I work around a job so that I can get the kids back that much faster. I feel like I'm losing in a way both ways. FUCK